Take a Step Out of Limbo to The Other Side of Fear
- olivierbranford
- Jan 17
- 9 min read
Updated: Jan 24
Limbo is a situation where you seem to be caught between two stages of life, or two doors, and it is unclear what will happen next. This generates fear: We become frozen in fear. We don't feel that we can move forward. It's a major cause of anxiety. What are the steps out of the limbo of fear? Fear is the mind killer.
Susan Jeffers wrote one of the landmark books on fear: ‘Feel the fear and do it anyway.' The overriding message of the book is that “You can handle it!” And you can! As Michael Neill wrote "We are not afraid of what we think we are afraid of... We are afraid of what we think."
Take a step out of limbo to the other side of fear
Remember all is very well. Slow down and breathe. Take time to respond, not react. It's time to get creative. Viktor Frankl wrote “Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and freedom.”
Our true enemies, as well as our true sources of strength, both lie within.
Don't be afraid of asking for help. Why are we so afraid of asking for help anyway? Because we fear that it means that we are not capable by ourselves and that makes us feel unworthy. Those are mortal fears but they needn't be. Human connection is a superpower. We have become a fragmented society. Talk about it. Be open, honest, and vulnerable. There are only two things that matter: Awareness and connection.
Surrender it all to you Higher Power, whether that's a person, organisation, or simply the Universe. The fear comes from not facing the things that keep you stuck in limbo and the false belief that we can control the Universe. It's such a relief to give up our obsession to control once we learn how. As we do to establish any new routine, we have to practice. In this case, we practice turning people and circumstances over to God. Our first reaction will be the familiar one, always. For so long, we thought we had to be in charge. It’s no wonder we felt crazy at times. We were trying to ensure other people did the right thing, based on our perspective. Usually, God, or they, had something else in mind. Letting God hold the reins gives us a lot of extra time. We can narrow our focus to what we need to do today. And we can use our extra time to pray for the well-being of other people. Our payoff is feeling sane, joyful, peaceful, and rested at the end of each day. Stop tryting to steal the pen - God is still writing your story. Control is the opposite of Faith. Stop fighting the world.
You don't need to be afraid of your fears. Staying stuck in limbo, as if between two doors, prevents you from feeling present. Inaction leads to fear. Action may even simply be not to take action, but that is a decision too.
You don't need to attach meanings or emotions to tasks and once action is taken, let go of the outcome. It is the fear over the outcome that keeps you stuck. Trust the process. The Universe has your back. A negative outcome says nothing about your worthiness. There is always a solution. It will come through help, surrender, and through intuition.
Life is all about who you are BEing and the Universe will direct the flow of your life, like water, to who you are meant to be. Just go with the flow. Surrender. There are miracles in letting go. Just take one step at a time into the darkness. You can get out of limbo and get to the end of it so that you can put your past behind you and live in the here and now.
Stop projecting outcomes. There are infinite possible outcomes. Intuition will guide you with clarity. It has been demonstrated that 90 percent of our fears never come to pass. Surrender and hand it over. The peace you will feel is directly proportional to your degree of surrender. No amount of worrying will change the situation. Don’t catastrophise. Don't 'awfulise'. The only thing going on is in your head. Connect with your true Self.
Worry is like a rocking chair - it doesn't get you anywhere. Worry is as useful as a chocolate teapot. If you feel restless, you need a spiritual solution. When outcomes are not in your hands, always hand them over.
Difficulties, mistakes, or any form of failure are simply steps that you are taking in your stride as you progress on your journey to success.
Trust that everything will be ok even if it’s not the way you want it to be. Nothing has happened. Get out of your head: It’s a dangerous neighbourhood - you are going to get mugged. Being stuck in your ego means that you are behind enemy lines.
The way through fear is action. FEAR is an acronym for ‘Face Everything And Rise’. Carl Jung wrote that “Neurosis is always a substitute for legitimate suffering.” You see, we go to any lengths to avoid pain, but the paradox is that in doing so we cultivate anxiety. The key is to face your fear head on, take intuitively inspired action and let go of all attachments to the outcome. Very few things that we worry about actually happen, and if they do, very few of these can’t be dealt with. So, take intuitive action and surrender the result to the Universe: It has your back. Overcoming fear simply requires action and the knowledge that the Universe will provide - let go of the outcome and the outcome will be the right one.
Instead, we feel fear twice - the fear about the fear, and then the fear, which is never as bad as you thought it would be. For example, those who are afraid of flying are terrified for some time before they get on the plane, but often find themselves laughing when the aeroplane takes off. Michel de Montaigne wrote “He who fears he shall suffer, already suffers what he fears.” Read that again.
Your problems are precisely as bad as you think. It's not your perceived problems that are the problem, it's your thinking. There are no real difficulties in life. You're not stuck: At any moment you have the choice to move out of limbo.
We can realise that fear, like all emotions, is just a comment on the quality of our thinking. Fear is simply incorrect thought.
Mahatma Gandhi said that "Where there is fear, we lose the way of our spirit." We don't like to admit that we are afraid. But when we won't admit the feeling, we can't deal with it. By denying our fears, we don't get stronger: We weaken ourselves. Denying fear doesn't get rid of problems. It only reinforces them. In the end, if we don't handle fear well, it rules us. Fear is a universal human emotion, and we can not eradicate it. We must learn how to handle the hot coals of fear. When we learn how, they don't have to be destructive. Handling fear begins with self-knowledge. We first learn that the unsettling feeling we have may be fear. Our desire to run away, or the tight knot in our gut, may be fear. That admission to ourselves can be followed by talking about it to a friend or a sponsor. Sometimes, just speaking the fear out loud to someone we trust is enough to put it back in perspective. We have handled it. The difference between a dream and reality is called action.
Without Faith, you can not walk this spiritual path. Without Faith, there is no love, and without love, life is empty. Open your heart and let love flow constantly, no matter how difficult life may seem on the surface. Rise above your external conditions and circumstances to those realms where all is light, all peace, all perfection, and where there is no separation. You must decide to do it, and then you must do it. Let nothing external pull you down. Find the glorious silver lining behind every dark cloud and focus on it until the cloud is gone. Begin living in the spirit and walking in the ways of the spirit right now.
Faith is knowing it will all unfold in a wonderful way, even though you cannot see it from where you are standing.
Everything is rigged in your favour
Jack Canfield wrote that "Everything you want is on the other side of fear." You are a limitless BEing held back only by your false beliefs: In other words, your fears. What if the opposite of all your fears were true? Who could stop you then?
I love the aphorism “Fear and Faith don’t live in the same house.” And the very short yet powerful story: “Fear knocked on the door. Faith answered. There was no-one there.”
Just let life unfold as it is. Fears are projecting from not living in present moment. They come from a life lived in the future. There is nothing to fear in the now.
When you take action, fear slips away into nothingness. You will also feel more accomplished and that you are achieving closure. Now you rise.
Trust the wait, embrace the uncertainty. Enjoy the beauty of becoming. When nothing is certain, anything is possible. To offer no resistance to life is to be in a state of Grace, ease, and lightness.
Once you have done this once you will make the same decision to take these steps more easily again. We drift in and out of consciousness. Surrender is a practice. The cards will fall where they fall. Then you just deal with the hand that you have been dealt with.
Don’t be afraid of anyone or anything. Realise that fear is just your thinking. If it feels like you are in a tailspin over something, allow the autopilot to kick in: The Universe will right the plane. And remember, as it says in the poem ‘Invictus’ by William Ernest Henley, “I am the captain of my soul.” Yes, you are...
Namaste.
Olly
Dr Olly Alexander Branford MBBS, MA(Cantab), PhD.
Fully qualified and certified coach
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