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Your Choice

Updated: Jan 28

Here is the last chapter of my book, to give you a flavour of what reading my forthcoming book will give you, and what is in store for you...


For the final chapter of my book, before the conclusion of this book, I would like to discuss choice. This is the golden key that unlocks every door: This is the key to wellbeing and the spiritual path, which simply means to choose love in every moment. This is done as follows:


1.    By choosing to be your Higher Self (love) in every moment, and especially every day when you wake up.

2.    By asking the question in every moment where you need to make a choice “What would love do now?” This is essentially the same as point 1. Having choice is your path to freedom. Victor Frankl, the psychiatrist and Holocaust survivor wrote "The last of the human freedoms: to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way. And there were always choices to make. Every day, every hour, offered the opportunity to make a decision, a decision which determined whether you would or would not submit to those powers which threatened to rob you of your very Self, your inner freedom; which determined whether or not you become the plaything to circumstance, renouncing freedom and dignity."


Your life: Your choice. Which path will you take?


The rest of the time you are being present. Eventually you will even make all of your choices from a place of presence. You will be present all the time, at the seat of your ease. You will no longer stand up and join the fight that is going on outside (the illusory world) or leave your haven of peace. Choosing your Higher Self in every moment may be achieved by making the highest choice in every moment. As Sigmund Freud said "In the important decisions, we should be governed, I think, by the deep inner needs of our nature."


Do you choose to go backwards, through the door labelled ‘ego, trauma, and fear’ or through the open door ahead of you labelled ‘Higher Self, peace, love, Real Personal Power, purpose, and joy’? As it states in Revelation 3:7-8 (and similarly in Isaiah 22:22) “And to the angel of the church in Philadelphia write; These things saith he that is holy, he that is true, he that hath the key of David, he that openeth, and no man shutteth; and shutteth, and no man openeth; I know thy works: behold, I have set before thee an open door, and no man can shut it: for thou hast a little strength, and hast kept my word, and hast not denied my name.” In Isaiah 9:6 it states “For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given, and the government will be upon His shoulders. And He will be called Wonderful Counsellor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.” You will give birth to your saviour, your ‘Prince of Peace’ if you choose this path.


Dr Wayne Dyer wrote "If you knew who walked beside you at all times, on the path that you have chosen, you could never experience fear or doubt again." Would you like to live free from pain, fear and doubt, and instead, live in total peace, love, joy and purpose? Cal Trask said in 'East of Eden' "Man has a choice and it's a choice that makes him a man."

 

Why do you insist on living in the experience of ‘Hell’, of your own creation, when "All is well and all shall be well"? I know this is true because I have been where you are. I have walked this path. We are all on this path, we just don't always know it. And we keep being sent lessons until we decide to wake up and walk through the open door ahead of us, closing the door behind us. This is the path of your life. It is the open door to Grace. I know what you are thinking - that's just religious mumbo jumbo. Again, that’s just your monkey mind. Open your mind, you will change your life...


Let go of your need to control the world. You can't. All you can do is choose in every moment who you are BEing. It is your choice: It's only your fear (the language of your ego) that tells you otherwise: Your ego screams in your ear that it's not your choice, that it's not your fault to choose or not to choose this stinking thinking, but it is: You cannot grow if you choose to remain in 'victim mode' and throw yourself a pity party. The pity party is over. We are all struggling. Only you can save you. Only you can hit your rock bottom. No-one else can understand you so that you don't have to: You need to find out who you Truly are. It's not a competition, it's a doorway.


The choice is: Speak your Truth and live in the sunlight or hide your Truth and live a lie. You hide consumed with shame and living in the fear of being discovered for who you truly are without your facade. Fear is a liar. Human fear comes from not feeling unconditionally loved or lovable, unworthy, or the fear of being abandoned if you show your true face and that as a result you won't survive. Take off your mask. Aristotle said “The ultimate value of life depends upon awareness and the power of contemplation rather than upon mere survival.” You need to understand you.


This is why you wear a 'mask' - the presentable face that you put on to try to get the love of your parents and society. This resulted in a fragmentation of your psyche: A breaking apart of your soul. Franz Kafka said "Start with what is right rather than what is acceptable." You have nothing to be ashamed of. You have a choice in every moment to be the highest version of you.


Your Higher Power is also called your soul, your real Self, your true Self, or your Higher Self. This is who you truly are. Anne Sexton said "Love your self's Self where it lives." We need a soul-led world not a soul-less world.


The stream of thoughts (the so-called ‘ stream of consciousness’) of the conscious self, the ego, is shallow and not very wide. Our totality (our subconscious Higher Self plus our conscious self) is much greater. St. Augustine wrote “I cannot grasp all that I am.” Such humility and perfect wisdom! Sandra Hochman said "What I wanted, was to be my Self again."


Are you (also called your false self, your fake self, or your ego - who you think you are, but are in fact not) struggling with pain or fear right now? Pain is the dwelling place of the ego. Fear is the language of the ego. Do you feel as though your life is spinning out of control? Are you feeling overwhelmed, anxious and depressed? Do you feel like you are drowning? Do you read a lot of 'self-help' books but find that they are not helping? Are you hooked on social media? Are you addicted to external validation? Are you craving 'imitation love' and instant substitute gratification? Charles Bukowski wrote "People will do anything, no matter how absurd, in order to avoid facing their own soul."


Adult cravings can never satisfy infantile unmet needs (unconditional love) and our experience of childhood and adolescence creates a false identity (the ego). Instead of primal needs being satisfied we experience primal pain. Until we feel it, learn from it, and let it go, we will continue to act from a subconscious place - we are asleep to life. As Carl Gustav Jung (the most famous psychiatrist of all time, who was also a spiritual Master) wrote "Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate. I am not what happened to me, I am what I choose to become. You are what you do, not what you say you'll do." You are not alone. We are all doing it all wrong. 


Our current Western 'civilisation' is encouraging us to be self-obsessed and to aspire to goals that do not originate from our souls. This is at the core of your pain, your fear, and your destructive conflict-seeking behaviour. The answer to all your problems may be very simple: You just need to let go of the illusion that you are in control. This is the key to healing from pain, fear, and self-obsession, as well as being the foundation for Self-realisation and Enlightenment. The spiritual path is simply one of endless surrender.

In the Bible in Romans 13:1 it states “Let every soul be subject unto the Higher Powers. For there is no power but of God: the powers that be are ordained of God.“ What if you are you an atheist or agnostic? There is a secular alternative to your Higher Power: Spirituality.

In either case, it's time to invoke your 'God-Mode'. As the Bible says in Psalm 46:10 "Be still, and know that I am God." This is a call to meditation, which unifies your psyche. When the unity of Self is divided or fractured, we are anxious, unhappy, and vulnerable. The repair of inner divisions is essential to wellbeing according to all schools of psychotherapy. The integration of our selves is a lifelong process and an essential part of mental wellbeing.

Carl Jung wrote "In each of us there is another whom we do not know. He speaks to us in dreams and tells us how differently he sees us from the way we see ourselves. When, therefore, we find ourselves in a difficult situation to which there is no solution, he can sometimes kindle a light that radically alters our attitude - the very attitude that led us into the difficult situation."


What's stopping you from having a spiritual experience? What’s stopping you from walking through the open door ahead of you? Your ego? Are you stuck on the idea of God? You don't need to believe in God to heal and recover, you just need to stop believing that you are God...


Pain and fear may originate from your inability to exert control over your life. In recovery from mental illness and addiction there is one thing that underlies all of your problems: Your resistance to the shift from your egoic fear to openness, vulnerability, courage, and willingness.


Knowledge and understanding alone do not lead us out of pain into a new life. If that were the case, psychiatrists and psychologists would have better success rates in healing us. I don't deny that they are useful disciplines as part of your healing: I assert that they might not be enough for you in and of themselves. That is certainly my experience and of most people that I have met who are on a healing journey.  They are simply tools, not a tool kit, or toolbox. They are metaphors that approximate Truth but are not the Truth in themselves. You need wisdom, Truth, and an individualised, tailored, healing journey. I know: I have been where you are right now. You need a guide: An Enlightened Witness. 


So, what is the source of our success in finding our paths? It's our ability to follow our Higher Power's cues. It's being tuned in enough to feel and act on the opportunities that our Higher Power presents to us each day. What comes from the soul originates from our Higher Power. Let us follow the prompting of our soul, so we may better learn what it means to live in the realm of our Higher Power. Abundance in life is the result of acknowledging our Higher Power and applying what we learn from it. How well do you express the prompting of your soul?


Sam Harris, the renowned philosopher and neuroscientist, wrote in his book 'Waking Up: A Guide to Spirituality Without Religion' that "A human mind is a wandering mind, and a wandering mind is an unhappy mind... This is not to say that external circumstances do not matter. But it is your mind, rather than circumstances themselves, that determines the quality of your life. Your mind is the basis of everything you experience... Our minds are all we have. They are all we have ever had. And they are all we can offer others. This might not be obvious, especially when there are aspects of your life that seem in need of improvement - when your goals are unrealised, or you are struggling to find a career, or you have relationships that need repairing. But it’s the Truth. Every experience you have ever had has been shaped by your mind. Every relationship is as good or as bad as it is because of the minds involved. If you are perpetually angry, depressed, confused, and unloving, or your attention is elsewhere, it won’t matter how successful you become or who is in your life - you won’t enjoy any of it... My mind begins to seem like a video game: I can either play it intelligently, learning more in each round, or I can be killed in the same spot by the same monster, again and again... Some people are content in the midst of deprivation and danger, while others are miserable despite having all the luck in the world. This is not to say that external circumstances do not matter. But it is your mind, rather than circumstances themselves, that determines the quality of your life. Your mind is the basis of everything you experience and of every contribution you make to the lives of others. Given this fact, it makes sense to train it... How we pay attention to the present moment largely determines the character of our experience and, therefore, the quality of our lives. Mystics and contemplatives have made this claim for ages - but a growing body of scientific research now bears it out... Every moment of the day - indeed, every moment throughout one’s life - offers an opportunity to be relaxed and responsive (instead of reactive) or to suffer unnecessarily... The reality of your life is always now. And to realise this, we will see, is liberating. In fact, I think there is nothing more important to understand if you want to be happy in this world... If you are thinking without knowing you are thinking, you are confused about who and what you are... I still considered the world’s religions to be mere intellectual ruins, maintained at enormous economic and social cost, but I now understood that important psychological Truths could be found in the rubble."


You live your life as two people - either as ego or as your Higher Power: In the same way as does a werewolf or Dr Jekyll and and Mr Hyde. Who you are is your choice. It's a daily choice every morning. Your Higher Power is your adult assertive self: In other words, the real you. The internet and social media allow people to dissociate their false selves from reality. They can live in a virtual world entirely as their ego: Their fake self. Studies show that two thirds of people spend 45 minutes editing their posted images on social media to meet their own ego 'ideals'. The photos do not look real. This way of being can actually lead to dissociative personality disorder. This can leave a false self, which is only a mask, enveloped in psychosis. The way they perceive themselves is completely different to how others perceive them. They lose all authenticity. The psychiatrist R.D. Laing wrote the book 'The Divided Self: An Existential Study in Sanity and Madness.' He developed the concept of ontological insecurity. Ontological refers to BEing. His watershed work aimed to make madness comprehensible, and in doing so revolutionised the way we perceive mental illness. Using case studies of patients he had worked with, Laing argued that psychosis is not a medical condition, but an outcome of the 'divided self', or the tension between the two personas within us: one our authentic, private identity (our Higher Power), and the other the false, 'sane' (but actually crazy) self that we present to the world (the ego). Laing was one of the twentieth century's most influential psychotherapists. This theory is entirely compatible with Carl Jung's findings. The ego makes a great servant, but a lousy and crazy Master. This is not pop-psychology. This is hard fact. Functional MRI scanners show different patterns of brain activity in people who are BEing authentic or inauthentic.


Sam Harris wrote "We are all seeking fulfilment while living at the mercy of changing experience. Whatever we acquire in life gets dispersed. Our bodies age. Our relationships fall away. Even the most intense pleasures last only a few moments. And every morning, we are chased out of bed by our thoughts." Those thoughts are fearful and come from the ego, until we choose otherwise.


Your ego is your petrified 7-year-old self who is trying to run your life from a place of fear and pain. To heal we have to let go of our ego - the 'little me', the 'King baby', or the “I, me, 'mine'” in your life. The ego is an illusion. The ego is simply self-will run riot: It is self-obsessed and self-destructive, like an internet troll.


The ego is simply a negative thought pattern from your conscious mind, which is fast asleep.

Sam Harris wrote "We grasp at transitory pleasures. We brood about the past and worry about the future. We continually seek to prop up and defend an egoic self that doesn’t exist." It might be time to let go of your ego. Holding on to your ego is like holding a hand-grenade with the pin pulled out or playing Russian roulette: Just watch the 'Deer Hunter' scene about Russian roulette if you want to know what it's like to try to survive life in fear (reacting - Christopher Walken) rather than from a place of relative serenity (responding - Robert de Niro). Trigger alert: This is not an easy watch. Compare and contrast the two ways of BEing in 'The Deer Hunter': Robert de Niro (responding from a place of calm) and Christopher Walken (reacting from fear).


Plato said "When the mind (the ego) is thinking it is talking to itself." When you are letting your conditioned thoughts rule your mind you are in ego-mode, and therefore behind enemy lines (the ego is not you!) He continued "For a man to conquer himself (his ego) is the first and noblest of all victories."


Ninety percent of your mind is subconscious. It is in the subconscious mind (your Higher Power) that all your true power lies, with infinite potential and possibility. 12-step recovery groups, modelled on the A.A. programme that was developed by Bill Wilson almost a century ago in 1935, have found that people can only recover if they connect with a Higher Power, have a spiritual experience, deflate their ego on a daily basis, and serve others in doing the same. Alcoholics and other types of addicts are no different to anyone else: They have just found a low-spirit solution (that doesn't work - so it's not actually a solution) to a high-spirit problem. Other people, who haven't found any kind of solution, are just restless, irritable, discontent, angry or hateful.


Our relationship and our journey into Nature, the Universe, or God is indeed a personal one. It does not need to be consistent with the definition of any established religious institution or the experience of any other person. In fact, we don't have to define our Higher Power even for ourselves.


Jesus said, according to Matthew 28:20, that "Teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you: And, lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world. Amen." The still quiet voice within is speaking to you right now and in every moment. This is the voice of your Higher Power.


To some of us it may seem that spirituality is out of reach when we begin our Hero's Journey to wellbeing. Maybe we never knew a Higher Power. Many of us grew up with an idea of God imposed upon us. This world is filled with so many different interpretations of a Higher Power. There is no reason why each of us cannot have our own concept.

I realised that part of my resistance to turning over my life and my will to the care of God was that I had superimposed my mother onto God. I did not want a version of a Higher Power that I could never live up to or never please, and who loved me conditionally. I had to say goodbye to her. When I could separate my view of my mother from my concept of God, I got a sense that there is a more unconditionally loving, giving and tolerant power in the Universe; that's the Higher Power that I build a relationship with today.


As Sam Harris wrote “Merely accepting that we are lazy, distracted, petty, easily provoked to anger, and inclined to waste our time in ways that we will later regret is not a path to happiness.” I think by the word happiness that he really means joy.


“Spiritus contra spiritum”, which was used by Carl Jung in a letter to Bill Wilson, literally translates to “spirit against spirit”.  Loosely translated, it refers to “A spiritual experience to counter addiction to the spirits (alcoholism).” Spiritus in Latin means both alcoholic beverages, i.e., spirits, and the highest religious experience. In relating this simple phrase, Jung confirmed for Bill W. that the A.A. program was aimed at spiritual development and a spiritual awakening, as treatment for alcoholism, and that this was the correct direction. The basis of 12 step recovery programmes is just letting go of the illusion of control. The ego is destructive to Self and others.


But what do you do if you are an atheist or an agnostic? The answer is that your Higher Power does not have to be God. A higher power simply means the process of deidentifying with your false ego, which is is trying to control the Universe through your self will run riot. Alfred Lord Tennyson, Queen Victoria’s Poet Laureate, wrote "Ring out the false, ring in the true."


In his brilliant book 'Waking Up' Sam Harris explains this process and how it relates to mental illness, addiction recovery, personal growth, and Self-realisation. We are all foot soldiers, not the general in the community that is the human race.


Psychotherapist Mike Stroh and Political Science Professor David Zarnett explored the thought-provoking ideas of renowned philosopher and neuroscientist Sam Harris and uncovered a fresh perspective on the Higher Power, mental illness, addiction recovery, personal growth, and Self-realisation.


The space that is created inside of us when we let go of our ego allows our psyche to reidentify with the part of us that is not trying to control the Universe. This is a good idea, as we simply cannot win in any battle against the Universe. Thinking that you can is an illusion and is holding you back from your true power: The Truth that you are one with the Universe, and not separate to it. In John 10:30 Jesus said "I and the Father are one.” Ego is an acronym for 'Edging God Out'. Invite her, him, or them back in.


A Higher Power is anything that is greater than your ego, which is pretty much anything. It can be your family, your community, love (another name for God), Jesus, God, or simply the sense of awe that is the experience of Nature, the Universe, or Truth. My Higher Power is Jesus, as he was a human being who had infinite potential, showing us that we all do once we drop our fears. Prayer and meditation are your superpowers. They are the only ‘atomic habits’ that you really need. They increase our conscious contact with our Higher Power. Jesus never came from a place of fear, only love. He never came from ego: He was always his Higher Self. That's the only difference between him and us. But it needn't be.


'Self-help' is a misnomer. 'Self-help' is the problem, not the solution! 'Self-help' is exactly what we shouldn’t do. The whole problem is that there is too much self and not enough Self.

When you choose to be and make all choices from your Higher Power, a place of love, you will become as new. It says in the Bible 2 Corinthians 5:17 "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new." Romans 12:2 states “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.”


Atheism and agnosticism are just the ego getting in the way of a spiritual experience. Spirituality does not mean God or religion. A spiritual experience simply means waking up to reality and Truth.


As Sam Harris wrote "Spirituality must be distinguished from religion - because people of every Faith, and of none, have had the same sorts of spiritual experiences... Atheism is not a philosophy; it is not even a view of the world; it is simply a refusal to deny the obvious. Unfortunately, we live in a world in which the obvious is overlooked as a matter of principle... One could surely argue that the Buddhist tradition, taken as a whole, represents the richest source of contemplative wisdom that any civilisation has produced."


Life is pretty straightforward really. You either choose to follow your ego or your Higher Power in every moment where you need to make a choice. Your ego is your contracted, petrified seven-year-old self, and your Higher Power is the deepest, assertive, sacred, inner true you. 


Your ego speaks with a loud, brash voice and makes demands like a 'King Baby', feeling that they must be in total control and yet feeling utterly unworthy at the same time. Your Higher Power speaks with a still, quiet voice, which comes from a divine Source.


The ego lives in an illusory world of fear: A self-imposed prison. The Higher Self lives in a world of love, compassion, and freedom.


We feel the need to control the Universe as we are in pain and fear. This is the human condition. We have our parents and society to thank for that conditioning. But we cannot blame them: That wouldn't help us or them.


Do you need a Higher Power? The answer is simply yes, if you want to get well and recover. A power greater than yourself is just not your self-will. You have tried that and it didn't work. I know as it doesn't work for anyone. The process is one of deidentfying with your illusory false self (your ego) and reidentifying with the part of you that is not trying to control the Universe. This simply means to stop being self-obsessed. This allows you to turn your life to the service of others. This is the only way to achieve anything of lasting significance. This is the only way to be truly abundant.


Healing is the emergence of other parts of your Self through the space that is created when you stop identifying with the ego, which is just self will. Healing occurs when we identify with the parts of our Selves that are not trying to control the Universe. Healing and recovery are all about just about letting go of control, and surrendering to the Universe. Letting go and getting guidance from the Universe doesn’t make us vulnerable: It makes us powerful. That is Real Personal Power. As Hagberg described there are six levels of personal power. Ego stops at level three. Hardly the keys to the penthouse.


It is by turning ourselves over to the service of others that we find our true Selves. Service is the process of becoming who you really are. That is the will of the Universe. It's also the way out of your self-obsession. I am sure that your friends will be glad too! Sam Harris wrote "You can learn something about a person by the company she keeps." Stop trying to fix, judge, criticise, and project onto others: You can't anyway, and they will run away as fast as they can from you. Sam Harris wrote “It may not be coincidental that you use phrases like ‘self-conscious’ when you really mean that you are conscious of others being conscious of you.” You have much inner work to do. It is by cleaning up your own house that you will serve. The question is? Do you want to? As Morpheus says to Neo in the iconic film 'The Matrix' "I'm trying to free your mind, Neo. But I can only show you the door. You're the one that has to walk through it." Are you ready?


Pain is simply an error in thinking. It results from a judgement that we made about a person, place, event, or thing. Experiences are simply lessons: There is nothing either good or bad about them. It is the part of us that loves us the most that sends these experiences so that we are allowed to choose our Higher Self if we so wish. Do not judge or condemn. That which you condemn will condemn you. That which you judge, you will one day become. Seek to support others with compassion who are changing their way of BEing. You have the freedom to create a higher and higher version of yourself: This is the road to Self-mastery. This is how you create - you choose you. This is free will. You will give birth to your saviour, and that saviour is you.


We all have the same fears. They have been conditioned into us as a result of our experience of childhood. 'If it's hysterical it's historical' as they say in psychotherapy in relation to trauma. It's what happened to you as a child in the absence of a compassionate witness. Michel de Montaigne wrote "A man who fears suffering is already suffering from what he fears." You are afraid of your unfelt fears. You need an Enlightened Witness to guide you. The past is over. There is no lion. It's your choice to wake up to authenticity and become whole again: To become integrated. To know your soul. You have projected your parents onto your idea of a judgemental 'God' based on a conditional fear-based past experience. So, you don't allow your Self to be vulnerable, open, willing, trusting, and unconditionally loving.


And now for the good news. There is a tried and tested formula, a recipe, the Truth of the ages and the sages: It works every time. Lao Tzu, The Tao Te Ching, Jesus, The Bible, The Buddha, Moses, Epictetus, Seneca, Marcus Aurelius, William Shakespeare, Albert Einsten, Isaac Newton, Pierre Teilhard de Chardin, Khalil Gibran, Friedrich Nietzsche, Carl Jung, Viktor Frankl, Psychoanalysis, Herman Hesse, Bill Wilson, The 12 steps, Swami Vivekananda, Ludwig Wittgenstein, Mahatma Gandhi, Martin Luther King Jr, Anthony de Mello, Paulo Coelho, Eckhart Tolle, Wayne Dyer, Alan Watts, Joseph Campbell, 'The Hero's Journey', Sydney Banks, 'The Three Principles', Michael Neill, Ram Dass, Bob Marley, Chögyam Trungpa, Thich Nhat Hanh, Charlie Chaplin, Gary Zukav, Deepak Chopra, Neal Donald Walsch, Michael A Singer, Byron Katie, Marianne Williamson, A Course in Miracles, Julia Cameron, 'The Artist's Way', Brené Brown, John Purkiss, Greg Baer, Ryan Holiday, Robin Sharma, even Yoda, to name but a few, and many many other teachers, spiritual Masters, books and philosophies have given us the formula. See my suggested reading list at the end of the book for a place to start. Read my online articles for my distillation of their wisdom. The formula is always the same. We just don't listen or see it until we are brought to our knees. We are all on our knees. You are on your knees. Otherwise, why would you be reading this book? Oprah has even shared this recipe on her show for years, and it has brought her peace, joy and billions of dollars as a side effect of her service to the world. You are looking for a way out of your personal Hell. Well, the way out is in...


The secret formula is no secret. The formula to find Heaven right now is simply this: Drop out of your mind (your ego), look within, open your heart, and connect with your intuition (the wisdom of your Higher Power).


All you require to do this is prayer, meditation, allow your Self to be vulnerable, and to 'discipline your mind.'


I am not talking about established religion, which is man-made and is therefore dominated by stinking thinking based on fear and hence why our experience of it is of judgement and intolerance. It's why we turn to spirituality, which has nothing to do with religion. I am talking about prayer, meditation and disciplining your mind as a recipe to find ‘Heave’n inside you right now and to transform your entire life. You were brought to your knees so that you would pray. It required this before you would hear what you need to hear.


Kahlil Gibran wrote in 'The Prophet' 'On Religion':


"The freest song comes not through bars and wires,

And he to whom worshipping is a window, to open

but also to shut, has not yet visited the house of his soul

whose windows are from dawn to dawn:


Your daily life is your temple and your religion. Whenever you enter it take with you your all.

Prayer is simply you asking the Universe to guide you on the path that has been given to you. If you ask in prayer, then follow your intuition in meditation, and express your gratitude, it will be given to you. You must claim it. It's asking for a reminder of who you truly are. You are a BEing that has limitless capability. You are far more than you ever imagined. Why do you insist on acting like 'King Baby'? Why do you incessantly seek egoic conflict and self-pity out of fear? Why do you act so big, when you are not so small? False ambition will rob you of your life. The Universe has a consciousness, an intelligence, a creative force, an energy that is known by many names. Some people call it 'God', or 'Nature', and some people call it 'love'. Call it what you will. It really doesn't matter what you call it. It's the ultimate reality. You can feel it, can't you? The awe and wonder of a starry sky. You feel that you are conscious. You feel that there is a you. It's your soul, it's your conscious awareness. You know it, even if words can never quite describe it. It doesn't have a name, as to name it would be to describe it. You can only feel it.


Pierre Teilhard de Chardin, a Darwinian scientist and philosopher, wrote "We are not physical beings having a spiritual experience; we are spiritual beings having a physical experience. Remain true to your Self, but move ever upward toward greater consciousness and greater love! At the summit you will find your Selves united with all those who, from every direction, have made the same ascent." It's quite the view. And you can see it right now.


You have so much light to give. Why do you keep it from the world? This is the path to Enlightenment...


Joseph Campbell wrote of the 'Hero's Journey' that lies ahead of you "We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. Find a place inside where there's joy, and the joy will burn out the pain. Each of us has meaning and we bring it to life. It is a waste to be asking the question when you are the answer. The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek. If you do follow your bliss you put yourself on a kind of track that has been there all the while, waiting for you, and the life that you ought to be living is the one you are living. Follow your bliss and don't be afraid, and doors will open where you didn't know they were going to be. If you follow your bliss, doors will open for you that wouldn't have opened for anyone else. The privilege of a lifetime is BEing who you are. Your own path you make with every step you take. That's why it's your path. Your sacred space is where you can find yourself over and over again. The goal of life is to make your heartbeat match the beat of the Universe, to match your nature with Nature. We're not on our journey to save the world but to save ourselves. But in doing that you save the world. The influence of a vital person vitalises. All the 'Gods', all the ‘Heavens’, all the ‘Hells’, are within you. If you are falling... dive." Perhaps it's time to have Faith, take the dive and follow your bliss? You have tried everything else. That didn't work. Joseph Campbell goes further and describes the Hero's Path:


'The Hero's Path' by Joseph Campbell:


"We have not even to risk the adventure alone

for the heroes of all time have gone before us.

The labyrinth is thoroughly known ...

we have only to follow the thread of the Hero path.

And where we had thought to find an abomination

we shall find a God.

And where we had thought to slay another

we shall slay ourselves.

Where we had thought to travel outwards

we shall come to the centre of our own existence.

And where we had thought to be alone

we shall be with all the world.”


Joseph Campbell is talking about slaying your ego. You must die to be reborn. Jesus said, "I tell you the Truth, no one can enter the Kingdom of God unless he is born of water and the Spirit. Flesh gives birth to flesh, but the Spirit gives birth to Spirit. You should not be surprised at my saying, "You must be born again." Be excited about this. Go all in. There is no need for apprehension.


Deepak Chopra wrote “The Universe contains three things that cannot be destroyed; BEing, Awareness and LOVE.”


Swami Vivekananda said “You can do anything and everything, without even the guidance of anyone. Stand up and express the divinity within you. They alone live, who live for others.” Here he is extolling the value of service. He continues “Whatever you think that you will be. If you think yourself weak, weak you will be; if you think yourself strong, you will be. Believe in yourself and the world will be at your feet. All the powers in the Universe are already ours. It is we who have put our hands before our eyes and cry that it is dark." You create your reality. What you think about you become. What you resist persists. Take the leap into the void and the net will appear. Get out of your own way. Trust the process. Let go, let God. If you let go of the controls the autopilot will kick in, but it won't if you don't. It can feel scary even if what you have tried so far didn't work. It can feel very difficult to trust in the Universe when we have never been able to trust anyone or trust in ourselves. Stop trying to fight the Universe - let go of the rope. All is well.


Meditation is where you hear the intuitive voice of the Universe guiding you on your path. It's where you hear the answer to your prayers.


Meditation can help us embrace our worries, our fear, and our anger; and that is very healing. We let our own natural capacity of healing do the work You don't will your physical wounds to heal. We let Nature take its course., Meditation is the dissolution of the negative thoughts that are not from our Self in eternal awareness or pure consciousness. When we meditate, what we actually do is enter into the deeper part of our BEing.


As Rumi wrote "The inspiration you seek is already within you. Be silent and listen." Listen for the still quiet voice of your Highest Self or 'God.' Step into the now and soar. Start with your fresh new dialogue with the Universe today. As Lao Tzu said "When I let go of who I am, I become who I might be." Let go of the past definitions of your Self. Voltaire, the philosopher and Enlightenment writer, said “Meditation is the dissolution of thoughts in Eternal awareness or Pure consciousness without objectification, knowing without thinking, merging finitude in infinity.”


Swami Vivekananda said “You have to grow from the inside out. None can teach you, none can make you spiritual. There is no other teacher but your own soul. The awakening of the soul to its bondage and its effort to stand up and assert itself – this is called life. All power is within you; you can do anything and everything. Believe in that, do not believe that you are weak; do not believe that you are half-crazy lunatics, as most of us do nowadays.”

Ludwig Wittgenstein puts it best “A man will be imprisoned in a room with a door that's unlocked and opens inwards; as long as it does not occur to him to pull rather than push it.” In the Bible in Psalm 46:10 it says "Be still, and know that I am God". The answers will come in the stillness.


As Charlie Chaplin said "As I began to love my Self I found that anguish and emotional suffering are only warning signs that I was living against my own Truth. Today, I know this is authenticity."


Awareness is key. Lao Tzu said “The key to growth is the introduction of higher dimensions of consciousness into our awareness.” Ram Dass said “Thoughts are going by like a river; awareness simply is.” Eckhart Tolle said “Rather than being your thoughts and emotions, be the awareness behind them.” You are the observer, the witness. The American psychologist Abraham Maslow, who created the 'Hierarchy of needs', a theory of psychological health predicated on fulfilling innate human needs in priority, culminating in Self-actualisation, said “What is necessary to change a person is to change his awareness of himself.” Amit Ray said “Raise your awareness and share your uniqueness to the world.” The implications are vast. The world needs your unique talents, especially right now. Amit Ray wrote “Your greatest awakening comes, when you are aware about your infinite nature.” Ram Dass said “I see my life as an unfolding set of opportunities to awaken.”


Ram Dass said “Coming into the place of Soul-awareness is coming home.” Tara Brach said “True refuge is that which allows us to be at home, at peace, to discover true happiness. The only thing that can give us true refuge is the awareness and love that is intrinsic to who we are. Ultimately, it's our own true nature.”


Rumi calls us to action and to be excited about it “Set your life on fire. Seek those who fan your flames... The breeze at dawn has secrets to tell you… Don't go back to sleep. There is a candle in your heart, ready to be kindled. There is a void in your soul, ready to be filled. You feel it, don't you?”

 

Once your awareness changes, your behaviour changes. Deepak Chopra said “A person is a pattern of behaviour, of a larger awareness.” Anthony De Mello wrote “All is well... Before changing the world transform yourself. Nightmares can’t hurt you when you wake up. You will change effortlessly when you wake up: As the light of awareness settles on darkness it disappears. Whatever is bad will disappear. Whatever is good will be fostered. Awareness is the most delightful and important thing in the world.”


Your heart is where your soul communicates with all the celestial forces. It's the download from the Universe. Your ego is who you think you are. The ego is a liar. It's really time to see through the absurdity of your own predicament. You aren't who you thought you were. You are so much more. Your soul is born of love. Your soul knows what to do. And in this very lifetime you can know it. Right now. The real work you have to do is in the privacy of your own heart. The real work is your inner connection. Quiet the mind. Open your heart. Don't worship the gate. Ignore the mobile phone in your hand. Go into your inner temple. Here is how to hear the still quiet voice of your soul:


Disciplining your mind: This process is so very simple. The key to awakening your Highest Self, your soul, is to be present at all times and from this place simply ask in prayer in every moment, in every choice, simply "What would love do now?"


The power of the mind is phenomenal. When negative thoughts creep through, they can hijack your day, or even your life, until you learn to overcome them. Understanding that thoughts can be changed is fundamental to switching from negative (fear) to positive (love or Higher Power) thinking, but understanding the difference between thoughts that help you and thoughts that hinder you is key to bringing about positive changes in your life.

When you have a clear vision of who you are as your Highest Self and how you want to live your life, you have the power to make choices that keep you on track to realising that vision. When you know what truly matters to you, impulsive thoughts can no longer lead you astray or influence your choices.


Knowing what 'Doing The Right Thing' means to you gives you the strength to stand firm and overcome any temptation; you have control because your thoughts are focused on who you are becoming.


Choosing wise thoughts to flourish and then allowing them to become wise deeds leads to an ever increasing self-satisfaction.


Your thoughts ultimately determine who you are, how you live, who you know, all you know, and all you can influence.


It's best to create your own prayer daily. Sometimes I simply pray "Thank you, thank you, thank you." Sometimes I say the prayer of St Francis of Assisi, which wasn't written by him, but I am sure that he would have approved of it (Mother Theresa said this prayer daily):


The 'Peace Prayer' of Saint Francis of Assisi

"Lord, make me an instrument of your peace:

where there is hatred, let me sow love;

where there is injury, pardon;

where there is doubt, faith;

where there is despair, hope;

where there is darkness, light;

where there is sadness, joy.

O divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek

to be consoled as to console,

to be understood as to understand,

to be loved as to love.

For it is in giving that we receive,

it is in pardoning that we are pardoned,

and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life."


As Marianne Williamson says "Just as you wouldn't leave the house without taking a shower, you shouldn't start the day without at least 10 minutes of sacred practice: prayer, meditation, and inspirational reading." You shower to wash the dirt off from the day before. Prayer washes off the fearful stinking thinking from the day before.


This process is not witchcraft, voodoo, black magic, or 'religion': It's how the Universe works. Try it and you will see. It's how you surrender, step out of the fearful thoughts that rule and ruin your life and into peace, light, love, purpose and 'divine' higher wisdom and Truth: How to BE. You will know what to do, once you know how to BE. The spirituality will take care of itself. Let go and enjoy the view. As 'The Bard' said "To thine own Self be true." As it says at the Temple of Apollo in Delphi the inscription above the entrance is "Know Thyself." Jesus said "Neither shall they say, Lo here! or, lo there! for, behold, the Kingdom of God is within you." Are you starting to hear?


'God' is just a short convenient name for the Universe, which is all of these:

·       Grow or die (love or fear)

·       Gift of desperation (you are on your knees)

·       Guide of destiny (your intuition)

·       Giver of data (how to be)

·       Garden of delight (heaven on Earth)

·       Good old dad (sending you love Dad!)

·       Gentleman of distinction

·       Guild of dreams

·       Guaranteed overnight delivery

·       Grand omnipotent divinity


You simply need a shift from:

·       Fear to love.

·       Pain to peace.

·       Grievances to miracles.

·       Victim to creator and Personal Power.

·       Ego to soul.

·       Wounded child to Higher Self.

·       Pity party to purpose.


It’s all the same thing. A Course in Miracles says that "'Only love is real': “The opposite of love is fear, but what is all-encompassing can have no opposite.” When we think with love, we are literally co-creating with God. And when we're not thinking with love, since only love is real, then we're actually not thinking at all." This is true whether your thinking applies to leadership, relationships, manifesting abundance, growth, personal development, whatever... The key is finding your Self and finding the Kingdom of Heaven within... This is what will revolutionise your life. Nothing else works. Trust me I have tried everything, so that you don't have to.


Whether you conceive of love or 'God' as a set of immutable cosmic natural laws (which Einstein believed in) or as an old man with a white robe and matching beard is totally and gloriously irrelevant. This Universal energy, consciousness or intelligence is formless. It's 'the great unseen.' We have to learn to trust in what we can't see. We have to let go.


You are not going crazy. As Friedrich Nietzsche wrote "There is always madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness." Einstein wrote a letter to his daughter on the Universal Force of Love. He wrote "There is an extremely powerful force that, so far, science has not found a formal explanation to. It is a force that includes and governs all others, and is even behind any phenomenon operating in the Universe and has not yet been identified by us. This Universal force is LOVE." Love is the oxygen of life. Love and fear cannot coexist. Love is Faith. Love is pure energy. Isn't it time that you tapped into it?


All that matters are your soul's core values and how you act upon them. Surrender all thoughts that are not of love. They are not real. You will know when the thoughts are not intuitive. When they are real they will feel like Truth, joy, peace, and love. Sören Kierkegaard the philosopher and theologian wrote "To love human beings is still the only thing worth living for, without that love, you really do not live." Surround your Self with unconditionally loving people


Emmet Fox said “There is no difficulty that enough love will not conquer: No disease that love will not heal: no door that enough love will not open... It makes no difference how deep set the trouble: How hopeless the outlook: How muddled the tangle: How great the mistake. A sufficient realisation of love will dissolve it all. If only you could love enough you would be the happiest and most powerful being in the world.”


In order to convince others of anything you must have had that real experience; walking the talk is the best way to ensure that you can build your level of Self-belief. I took leaps of Faith not knowing where I was going to land, but it was how I learned to lose my fear, believe in my Self, trust in the Universe, grow wings and survive any fall. Action dissolves fear. The summary of the book 'Feel The Fear and Do It Anyway' by Susan Jeffers is that: 'You can handle anything'. You really can! As Dan Millman, the Olympic athlete and spiritual teacher wrote “Only action brings potential to life.”


Roy McAvoy said in the film 'Tin Cup' that "When a defining moment comes along, you can do one of two things: Define the moment or let the moment define you." As Matt Main says "This is your script. What's it to be? Is the pen in your hand? Or in someone else's?"

Whatever you are looking for is also looking for you. You see, don't only look. Be available and ready when it shows up. You are so much more than you realise. You are in such a better place than you think. You have come so much further than you believe. The richer the soil, the more unforgivable the failure to cultivate it. You will discover your Self. In the book 'When Nietzsche Wept' the philosopher says, "If you have not attained your Self, then duty is merely a euphemism for your own further enlargement.” It's time to slay that ego and give birth to the highest version of you. You have a soul that is ready to know. Think about what YOU want that brings you peace, love, joy and real purpose. All is well. And all shall be well. 


What do you think?


Who do you choose to run your life? Your wounded inner child or your Higher Self?


When you choose to follow your heart (Higher Self) and not your head, expect that your head (egoic fear) won't go without a fight. It's a daily decision.


Kahlil Gibran wrote in 'The Prophet' 'On Self-Knowledge':


"And a man said, Speak to us of Self-Knowledge.

And he answered, saying:

Your hearts know in silence the secrets of the days and the nights.

But your ears thirst for the sound of your heart’s knowledge.

You would know in words that which you have always known in thought.

You would touch with your fingers the naked body of your dreams.


And it is well you should.

The hidden well-spring of your soul must needs rise and run murmuring to the sea;

And the treasure of your infinite depths would be revealed to your eyes.

But let there be no scales to weigh your unknown treasure;

And seek not the depths of your knowledge with staff or sounding line.

For self is a sea boundless and measureless.


Say not, “I have found the truth,” but rather, “I have found a truth.” 

Say not, "I have found the path of the soul.” Say rather, “I have met the soul walking upon my path.”

For the soul walks upon all paths.

The soul walks not upon a line, neither does it grow like a reed.

The soul unfolds itself, like a lotus of countless petals."

 


Speak in such a way that others love to listen to you: Listen in such a way that others love to speak to you.


George Bernard Shaw wrote that “Progress is impossible without change, and those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything.” Are you ready to change your mind?


Namaste.


Sending you love, light, and blessings brothers.


Olly



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Hello,

I am delighted and enchanted to meet you. I coach men with 'Deep Coaching', 'Supercoaching', and Transformative Life Coaching (TLC). Thank you for reading this far. I very much look forward to connecting with the highest version of you, to seeing your highest possibility, and to our conversations. Please do contact me via my email for a free connection call and a free experience of coaching on Zoom or in person. 


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I have a Bachelor's degree in Natural Sciences from Trinity College, Cambridge; a Master's Degree in Philosophy from Trinity College, Cambridge; a PhD Doctorate in Scientific Research from University College London (UCL); a Medical Degree (MD/MBBS) from The Royal Free Hospital School of Medicine, London and have been a doctor and reconstructive trauma and cancer surgeon in London for 20 years. I have a number of other higher qualifications in science and surgery. I have published over 50 peer reviewed PubMed cited scientific journal articles, have been an associate editor and frequent scientific faculty member, and am the author of several scientific books. I have been awarded my Diploma in Transformative Life Coaching in London, which has International Coaching Federation (ICF) Accreditation, as well as the UK Association for Coaching (AC), and the European Mentoring and Coaching Council (EMCC). I have been on my own transformative journey full time for over five years and I am ready to be your guide to you finding out who you really are and how the world works.




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